One of my favorite few days of the year, are the Wednesday,
Thursday, and Friday of Thanksgiving weekend. Why? Because for me it’s the
one holiday when I don’t have to work. It’s an opportunity to clear my head
a little and to spend time with family. And as our parsha opens this week, Chazal point out that Yaakov was
looking for a little peace and quiet as well. “And Yaakov settled in the land
of his father, the land of Canaan.”
Chazal, picking up on the relatively superfluous nature of
telling us that Yaakov was living in the Land of Canaan, make the following
statement:
ביקש יעקב לישב בשלוה, קפץ עליו רוגזו של יוסף.ט צדיקים מבקשים לישב
בשלוה אומר הקב”ה לא דיין לצדיקים מה שמתוקן להם לעולם הבא, אלא שמבקשים לישב
בשלוה בעולם הזה:
Yaakov wanted to live with a little peace and quiet, and at that moment,
the challenges of Yosef and his brothers begin.
And continues the medrash: The righteous want to live quietly, and Hashem tells them: “Is it not
enough that the world to come is prepared for them, but they also wanted to
live peacefully in THIS world!?”
And the medrash is somewhat startling. Yaakov Avinu has experienced
more tzaros, more challenges at this point in his life than multiple people experience
in their lifetimes: He had to run from his life from his brother. His married
life was turned on its head by his father-in-law. His wife passes away young
during childbirth. His daughter is kidnapped and assaulted, and his sons go on
a murderous rampage in response. Is it so terrible that Yaakov wants a little
time to live quietly for a short time?
Rav Moshe Feinstein in his sefer Drash Moshe argues that Chazal
intended to teach a deeper lesson here. Of course, Yaakov Avinu had been
through so much, and it was fair that he wanted a break. However, says Rav
Moshe, when it comes to the chinuch of our children, there is no time when we
are truly “off” and no time when we “retire”. Throughout their childhood, we
partner with our children’s shul and school to make sure the messages that are
being taught are consistent and strong. We do not leave the chinuch of our
children to others. As they grow older and go off “on their own” we never truly
leave them on their own, as they continue to need our encouragement and
guidance. Hence, argue Chazal, when it came to his children, Yaakov’s desire “Leishev
B’shalva” was not going to be an option.
Rav Nissan Alpert offers a different insight. He writes that what chazal are emphasizing here
is that while we oftentimes prefer “leishev b’shalva”, to live a quiet, unassuming
life, with our own “inner peace”, if there remains a lack of shalom within Am Yisrael, then no Jew can really feel b’shalom.
There will be times when we, as a
nation, can experience a respite from our enemies from the outside. But when it comes to our continued pursuit of
Ahavas Yisrael, there is no time for a break until that issue is solved.
Rav Adin Even-Yisrael Steinsaltz offers a profound insight into the
issue of our desire to find Shalom V’Shalva, peaceful tranquility in life. He
points out that in our world, one of the most sought-after commodities is “peace
of mind”. People may call it different things: Happiness, fulfillment, meaning.
We are all filled to different degrees with insecurities and doubts about
ourselves. And there is nothing we want more than to feel a sense of calm and
serenity that we are whole, that we are living a good, purposeful life.
To a certain extent, argues Rav Steinsaltz, a life of Torah gives
us just that. A life that is structured by halacha allows an individual to
pursue that which he or she values and to stay away from that which is not part
of one’s value system. Endeavoring to find success in living such a life can give
a person a certain sense of fulfillment and even a certain calm. I know what I
am living for.
But even while this is true, if you had to find a theme throughout
our halachic system, and really throughout Jewish thought, the one issue that
comes back over and over is the issue of QUESTIONS. Rav Yannai writes in Pirkei Avos 4:16: “We don’t hold in our hands why the evil live
a calm life while the righteous suffer.”When we face the reality of so many
situations in the world, say Chazal, we are left not with answers, but
questions.
The Gemara in Brachos 64a writes: “Torah scholars don’t get a break
not in this world and not the next.”
Apparently, somehow a world of questions and a world without rest
is integral to what it means to be successful as a Jew. And, of course, anyone
who lives life as a person of faith understands that it is difficult to live in
this world. There are so many unanswerable questions, so many challenges, and difficulties.
It is almost as if questions are part and parcel of our identity.
It is said that Eskimos have many different words that describe snow.
It is no wonder considering that the environment of the Eskimo is lived almost
entirely in snow. So, over time, they have developed a more nuanced appreciation
and understanding for different types of snow. And, it can be argued, the same
is true for the Jewish People and questions. If you study gemara, there are
maybe 9 or 10 different ways the gemara will introduce a question: Ur’minhu,
tiyuvta, kasha, and more. Why? Because we live in a world of questions, and we
embrace the questions, so we have developed a nuanced approach to understanding
all the different kinds of questions – even those for which we have no answer.
But why? Why are questions
so fundamental to who we are as a people, so much so that one might argue that
we THRIVE on questions? The answer is that to question is not to be weak, to question
is to show a desire to understand more, to have a deeper, more nuanced
understanding. In our tradition, it is the Talmid Chacham, the one with the
MOST knowledge, who asks the MOST questions. To question is to be open to the
possibility that I don’t yet understand, to have the humility to discover more
about others, about ourselves, and about God and His world.
And this, argues Rav Steinsaltz, is what Chazal meant in our medrash.
Yaakov wanted to live a life of peace and tranquility. Says HKBH: Yaakov, peace and tranquility, the
calm and easy life is not what life is all about. Yes, it is necessary at times
so that we can prepare ourselves for our next challenge, but calm and easy are
not the ends, they are the means to continuing to pursue the next question, to overcoming
the next challenge. But it is not because Hashem wants us to live a life of
chaos and discomfort. Just the opposite, it is because He wants us to live a
life where we continue to deepen our appreciation for the people around us and
the world in which we live.
This approach may not offer us much solace when we are in the throes
of a particularly difficult challenge or moment of questioning. Some questions
seem too big and some mountains too difficult to scale. Nevertheless, perhaps the
REASON we spend so much time in our schools, shuls, and homes ENCOURAGING
questions, reminding our children and ourselves that questions give us more
insight into the world and into ourselves, is so that when we experience
moments of our greatest challenges, when we experience the BIG QUESTIONS, the
challenge can feel a little less daunting.
It is in those moments that we are reminded that questions do
not topple our faith, they are the bedrock of it.
So, is it so bad to enjoy the thanksgiving break as a chance to
relax a little? I don’t think so. It is these short breaks that give us the strength
to move forward afterwards, ready to address the next question.